Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows: Part 1
Director: David Yates
Cast: Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint
Rated: PG-13
Running time: 146 minutes
OK, Harry Potter is great for a few reasons. The biggest is that millions of kids realized they could read big books and they did so over and over again. The movies have also been nothing if not entertaining. And of course, Harry has made many people dump trucks of cash.
So, when you're making this sort of insane money, it's understandable to want to drag it out for as long as possible. It's this greed that made the Potter people decide to split the final film into two parts. That's fine - as we learned from Kill Bill, this can be done well. At the end of the first Kill Bill you felt like you had watched a complete movie and the second simply added another complete product to make one super creation.
Here, however, you have an example of a film made by people who probably enjoy kicking puppies in the face. These greedy, arrogant twits decided that instead of making two complete films, they'd simply make one-half of a decent film. Then they realized if they added 20 minutes to the front and back and cut it in half, they could buy another mansion and yacht.
Well, this might have worked, but anyone who's seen a Harry Potter movie knows that the first half is just teen drama filler with lots of pining, sulking and bad writing making kids do stupid things. The second half is where things get good both plot and action wise, making the final product an enjoyable ride.
But if you were to cut any of them in half, you would have one movie that was complete garbage and one that might be good. That's exactly what they did here. This movie offers nothing but the slow setup and ends with the distinct feeling that someone just stole your wallet, spat in your face and laughed, knowing you're going to come back for more.
Well, screw you, Harry Potter people (the makers, not the fans). I hope the multiple millions of dollars you make will help you sleep at night. Personally, I sleep well thinking one day you will suffer a Twilight Zone hell where every movie you watch is suddenly stopped in the middle and for the rest of your days, you never get to enjoy a complete motion picture.
